Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Wave

Writing falls on you like an avalanche, waterfall sweeping away all other, less important things, forcing you on a front line with your pen and paper or more likely smart phone or tablet. Things've changed and there isn't always anything to scribble on, plus it's easier to correct and save instead of carrying heaps of papers with questionable handwriting and strange abbreviations that might as well make very little sense later on.
Words are pouring in, back and forth as you go, at home or city trains, anywhere they can catch your attention.
Operating on some other level you look from various angles at world around you and somehow see more than just the surface of busy streets with people and scenery constantly changing appearances, somehow you recognize the pattern in this chaotic flow and start plotting the next step. You can write about it or not, you can revisit it later in months or years, or you can fly over the whole big picture and capture it right now when it's happening, right then and there, on the spot, untainted by blurry memories and later regrets. After all, it is happening right in front of your eyes, something that one day will become a story to tell, mood to capture and try to pull it out of the dusty pockets of memory to look at one more time with nostalgia and sadness of fading away time.
It might be important or mundane and you won't know it right away. Events are random pieces that may or not come together to form an unforgettable fabric.
Who would know? Today stones under your feet might as well be the roof above your head in some other reality that you are not aware of at this moment.
The incredible pace flies you over all this trivial little details allowing to select the ones you deem worthy and bring them to light, give them color and shape and personality to live on at least for a while, in the limelight of attention.
Squeaky sound of trains pulling off the platforms, unavoidable noise of announcements is just a background for the bigger drama unrevealing on the stage with people and things around not knowing that they're in it.
Time operates on two different lines. Sometime they cross but mostly running in parallel, one always faster than another.
Thoughts are ruffled, interruptions happen again and again but don't matter. Dancing on the glass screen fingers are busy trying to follow the unrealistic pace of thoughts and images swirling in your mind, to record the bits and continue with this strange gallop until the final stop when you can sit back and look at what you've done, surprised by the length, direction or choice of words that seem to have life of their own breaking out in the open from the recesses of your subconsciousness that can no longer contain them inside.
The ride is over, train of thought is slowing down, the thrill is wearing off, leaving marks of something that has just happened and still doesn't have any name, looking to live and be seen, to tempt and challenge every fiber of your being out of cosy predictability, braking barriers  of logic and it doesn't matter at all.
The tidal wave has come and gone leaving you on the shore to wait until the next ride.

Monday, January 27, 2014

Dreaming

Let me dream about what might've been, in one of other lives, maybe, with circumstances in sinc, with time and place irrelevant, drifting in and out, enjoying the glimpses of 'what if' and living through it with the sharpness of the clear day with all colors and sounds mixing up, filled with emotional upheaval that comes down like an avalanche but instead of burring you underneath lets you soar as high as you can see, when catching your breath looking down is so exhilarating like nothing you've ever experienced and then plunge into the rainbow of feeling you never knew existed, were possible or even had names, with tidal wave carrying you further away in this marvelous ride devoid of any immediate concerns, so precarious and so liberating with all the euphoric undertones and forgotten worries, with sweet aching and longing to continue this race, burning candle at both ends until it lasts, deep down knowing it won't and still wishing for the miracle.

Infatuation

Living is being in and out of love with someone or something. Rising to the heights and falling into abysses and putting yourself together in all new places and times readying for another ride on a crazy roller-coaster with all the promises of thrill and heartbreak, tingling butterfly wings in your throat and rains of sorrow wiping everything on its way just to let new grass appear again and again in the endless chain of events that form and shape very inner being leaving you with all the creases and scars of old dramas, unresolved issues and undying hopes piled in the immaculate line of events that will mold you day after day, year after year, ever surprising when it happens, taking by storm that comes with downpour from the most unexpected places and refuses to leave until you are finished satisfying this hungry need to peel the surface, layer by layer in a desperate attempt to make some kind of sense out of this universal game, until the mind is so exhausted in the treacherous run with edgy feelings that overwhelm and challenge every perception forcing to transform yourself into something new, readying for another step or stage in this tiring but never dull marathon we call life

Friday, January 24, 2014

Miracle

At times an exquisite beauty will make you stop, linger, walk away and turn back to take another look, to pause and observe the lines adding up in something so unique and almost perfect, although without the cold detachment, with all the life touches and scars, humorous lines and little wrinkles of age, subtle changes reflecting the light and depth with the warmth coming from within of something so extraordinary and at the same time so simple and accessible but still inspiring quiet fascination and wonder with the unstoppable desire to stay and watch with the pleasure and longing, full of uncertain emotions that are new and refreshing, watching from the distance and closer, changing angles, unable or unwilling to look away even for a second