Showing posts from December, 2011


Life is seeping away like water
Running through fingers 
Trembling with fear

Illusive lights 
Show the road untraveled 
Full of promise, new and enticing 

Blurry vision of days and years 
Slowly falling in memory pockets
To be retrieved some other time...


What can you do when you are chained to a speeding train that only accelerates. To jump off, continue with the insanity or find the way to soar free. 
If all the hours of pain and despair taught you anything it's to wait, hoping 'what if'. What if the next turn will have the answers you are looking for. Hope, peace, sanity.
Illusions are floating in the air even when there isn't any strength to hold on and you are just instinctively clutching at the last reason.
Survival is so deeply rooted that it wouldn't let you go easily even in the darkest of moments. 
What makes us endure, stand up from broken knees over and over again, against all odds, against time and ourselves hiding deeper and deeper begging for mercy of an oblivion, from past, present, memories, faces...
But tireless carousel is spinning ever so faster, and world outside is just a set of blurry images of what was, is and will be...


Sometimes it's small and non-intrusive. It follows you around quietly without an argument. You hardly notice it exists. 
At times it's bigger and more pronounced. You see it when taking photos under the bright sun in short winter afternoons. It's stepping in in front of you to make a point.
And then the time comes when it starts to hover above you where it's getting harder to ignore it. It covers your sky, just a small part at first,  then slowly spreading like a big stain and taking away the sun and the sky, taking away warmth, light, color,  playing with your mood and finally getting your full attention.
It starts sipping through your pores, getting inside even deeper. You are suddenly very aware of the probing intruder searching for something with its alien fingers. The cold is invading you like a doubt, occupying your waking thoughts, not allowing to forget its presence even for a minute...
till the next sunny day that is suddenly here washing away all the dark spo…